Teabagging and Spanking: Our Thoughts at Tax Time

Tea Bag

by Mike on 4/15/2009

in Cold Hard Cash, Mob Rule, Perpetual Beta : Release, Possibly Abrasive

You’ve got a dirty little mind, don’t you?

As tax time approaches, we watch our government borrow more heavily than ever to soothe the economic chafing caused by, well, borrowing too much money, ultimately increasing the amount of money we’re going to have to send to Uncle Sugar next year at this time, some of you seem to be a bit upset.

And, a little twisted. (You freaks.)

Three years ago, I wrote “Getting the Switch,” an allegory about the cruelty our government foists upon us every April 15. Not so much the payments, but the paperwork. (Ok, the payments, too.) That’s become one of the most popular posts ever on this website.

The search results that have spawned from that entry are, to say the least, disturbing.

But willow-switch spankings were so 2006. In 2009, the new style is Boston Tea Party re-enactments. Anti-tax protesters around the country mail tea to their Congressional representatives (sometimes shutting down the offices in the process) and otherwise distribute tea in its most common commercially occurring form – the tea bag.

Which means, of course, that the current tax protests are now known as “teabagging.”

Tax time, it seems, brings out the hidden pervert in all of us, bringing our most aggressive perversions to the core: flogging with branches, forcing one’s genitalia in someone else’s face… apparently, we’re not only mad, we’re also, well, stimulated.

So next year, I’m writing about prison rape.

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