all props

You'll notice a couple of large breaks in the dates of these columns. Some of these date back to the first, sputtering incarnation of the Ministry which was discontinued. Those "classics" and their more modern successors are archived here for the whole family to enjoy.

December 5, 2001

Judging the Senate - Is a Republican accusing a Democrat of blocking federal court appointments? Could this be possible? You better bet it is.

November 27, 2000

A Swing and a Whiff - One fork of Gore's tongue rasps praise for counting every vote, while the other fork issues commands to his agents to trash fifteen thousand votes.

October 23, 2000

Tactical Blunder - In order to get what they want, Nader supporters have to cost Gore this election.

August 8, 2000

Military Theater - Think two divisons of the Army aren't ready for duty? You're wrong. It's much worse than that.

July 28, 2000

Cheney Critics Hit a Sour Note - Having seen the outraged, foam-at-the-mouth reactions of the left-wing, I'm convinced that Cheney is the perfect choice.

April 20, 2000

Getting Schooled - Free your child's mind, and the rest will follow.

March 06, 2000

Haikus of a Contract Attorney:

Menial labor
Parents can't grasp why I went
To law school for this

January 04, 2000

Putting the Home Back in Home Invasion - I'm from the government, and I'm here to help.

December 01, 1999

A HMOdest Proposal - Let's turn our health care system over the the same folks who brought us $400 hammers and the Communications Decency Act.

October 26, 1999

Go, Pat, Go! (get the hell out of my party) - It's last call at the Reform Party Saloon - who's the Party going home with?

June 16, 1998

Bushwhacked - written back when folks thought even George Bush Senior would make a better president than Al Gore.

April 1, 1998

Fifty Uses for a Bent Penis - We've known all along that Slick Willie was crooked, but we had no idea just which direction - until now.

All blatherings copyright 1998, 1999, 2000 by the author. All rights reserved. You can look, but don't touch. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's blatherings.

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